The Next Step. Week Eight. Walking Your Talk

The Next Step. On-Line Interactive Wellbeing Program


“All know the way, but few actually walk it” – Bodhidharma

Sometimes, understanding personal responsibility can be overwhelming. Why would we want to create uncomfortable or painful experiences for ourselves? Our mind cannot comprehend this, because it thinks life should be easy. As you’re discovering, there is a difference between easy and grace-full.

Learning to put our knowledge into action is true wisdom.

But sometimes it’s easier said than done.

But when we go back to basics, we begin to make it easier on ourselves.

During this course so far, you’ve learned concepts like:

  • How your body responds to your thoughts – self awareness
  • Why it’s important to go ‘beyond the story’ and get to causal issues
  • How you’ve formed beliefs about you, your life, and your role in it, and how to reframe those beliefs
  • The mirror – using significant personalities in our life, and the emotional triggers they present, to provide us with powerful learnings, which help us move out of victimhood


And as you’ve learned, there is no magic pill for happiness!

What we provide in this course is a detailed recipe for living a life of


This means we do things – vigilantly when we first begin – which continue to confirm the new belief that we are worthy of creating a life worth living. When we live a life worth living, we are no longer a victim. We accept our own power to create.

We say ‘vigilantly’, because often it’s hard when we begin. It takes a lot of effort, and it can be exhausting (as you’ve probably experienced!).

But as time goes on, and we continue to do the little things, it gets more grace-full.

Learning to ‘Walk Your Talk’, to us, is all about knowing what you stand for, and making all your decisions based upon this.


We call it ‘Principles-Based Living’

Your big picture, or vision of your life must be congruent with every part of you. If it’s not then imbalance, fractures and rigidity creep in; all as we know weaken resilience and cause dis-harmony in our lives.

Take some time now and view this video on decision mis-alignment to refresh your memory on how this all fits together:


Principles are the foundation elements of us as human incarnations of our soul. They are our internal bedrock. They are the fundamentals that we must live according to. They state what are the key important elements in the relationship we have with ourselves.

Principles won’t be linked to an emotion as they’re deeper than that; they exist at a core level. They may be linked to a heart state like Love, Compassion, Humility, etc. Now list your principles with a statement as to what this principle means to you:

Now, take some time to record five principles for your life, and what they mean to you …

For example, if ‘walking a mile in another’s moccasins’ is important to you, Compassion may be one of your principles. The next step is to understand what this means to you because, as you’ve learned, if you’re not exercising compassion to self first and foremost, your compassion for others will be tainted. 

And what of Values?

If principles set the foundation for the path we walk in life, our values tell us how we want to walk it; how we want to engage the external world and what we how important in these engagements.

Values will change according to your phases of life, or circumstances of life. 

For instance, if you’re a parent, before you had children, there may have been no value associated to children in your life. This obviously changes when you reproduce. 

Take a moment now to record those things that are important to you. And again, why are they important to you. It’s always essential to be able to link them to a greater ‘why’. 

Make a list of about 5-10 values.


The Importance of Messages:

Many people become fixated on “I must leave a legacy”. They pursue external projects in the hope of leaving a stamp on human existence. This can be healthy or unhealthy, depending on what fuels it. In its purest form leaving a legacy is all about service to others and helping a message be transmitted.

A person who pursues housing for the homeless is leaving a message to the homeless people that they are valued and loved; they are worthy of having a roof over their heads, which can help them feel safe. It must be remembered that a message requires a transmitter and a receiver. Just because you transmit a pure message, doesn’t mean it will always be received with purity. This emphasises the importance of letting go of the outcome.

To see what your messages are and clarify them to their purest form, take a look towards what you would like your children to know if you were to die tomorrow. If you were on your deathbed and your child was stand next to you, what guidance for life would you give:









Now, consider these messages and ask yourself:

  1. How am I living this message
  2. How can I step up in living this message? 
  3. What do I want to do to step up in living this message?


There is some gold to be found when you do these exercises with thoughtfulness. The more clarity you receive around your values and principles, the more you will find yourself walking your talk. 

Remember, it’s a process, and a process comes with lessons, obstacles and wins. Embrace all of them.

Until next week


Man hugs and Big Love   

James and Kirsty